Overcoming Adversity - The Breakthrough Formula
Imagine being trapped.
100% completely trapped.
I’m not talking about a temporarily disabled elevator, or in a bathroom with a stuck door or even being locked in a grungy basement with cobwebs and barely any light. As creepy as that might be, I’m talking about being completely trapped within your own body. You can’t lift a finger, can’t turn your head, can’t move a single muscle. You can’t speak, so you can’t be heard. You can’t shout out to anyone that you are there, that you exist within the shell of this body. You are you in mind and spirit, but you’re completely shut off from the outside world. No one knows you’re in there. This was my life for four long years.
As a result of two rare neurological conditions that we still don’t know how or why I contracted, I quickly went from being a normal, active girl with the world at her fingertips, to being locked in my own body, in a vegetative state, often convulsing for 18 or more hours a day. I listened to doctors tell my parents, right in front of me, that I was never coming back. They didn’t know I could hear them. I could, and I did.
But my parents never gave up. Ever. They turned our living room into a hospital room and tirelessly, faithfully, searched for answers. Meanwhile, I was left alone with my thoughts and time, seemingly endless amounts of time. With only my mind and thoughts left within my control, I could do nothing else but think, and doing so often got very scary, very quickly.
What if this is it for me?
What if I am to forever be trapped inside myself unable to ever connect with anyone?
Despite being young, I knew these defeatist thoughts were dangerous. They could suck what little life I had left right out of me. So, I did everything I could to push those thoughts to the corners of my mind and try to focus elsewhere. With my mind as my only tool, I had to find a way out, a way to break through and reconnect with the world around me.
To try and quiet the terrifying thoughts of a possible lifetime of incapacitation and isolation, I tirelessly tried to focus on the positives. From what I’m describing you might not see any positives whatsoever, and it’s hard to argue otherwise, but I believe if you dig deep enough in any situation there are always at least a few things worthy of gratitude.
In my case, I wasn’t dead yet, right? That may be scraping the bottom of the good-news barrel, but it was a start. Also, I was surrounded by two incredibly loving parents and three brothers who tended to my every need. That too was a huge blessing. For these things, I was incredibly grateful and I’m convinced it was that mentality of gratitude that led to my Breakthrough Formula.
When I intentionally put my mind on the positives, things didn’t seem quite as bad as they once did. My perspective began to shift a bit and this created a tiny bit of hope. Hope that maybe tomorrow would be just a little better than today. Hope is immensely powerful. With it, human beings have shown themselves to be capable of enduring almost any hardship. Without it, life can quickly seem not worth living.
In my condition, focusing on the positives, trying to find gratitude, took a lot of hard work. Resisting what seems like my mind’s natural inclination to wander and flicker from thought to thought took a lot of mental focus, and frankly, it was hard. But the more I forced myself to do it, the better I felt, my perspective continued to shift from the negative to the positive. This led to more and more hope which fed my willingness to continue to work hard at controlling my focus, of intentionally putting my mind in a very particular place. This cycle of focusing on gratitude, which creates perspective change, which results in hope, which is fueled by more effort became my Breakthrough Formula. Gratitude, Perspective, Hope and Effort. This became my roadmap back to life.
I believe this formula is what created a tiny miracle that eventually saved my life. One day, after four long years, I regained the ability to blink. Suddenly I had a way to reconnect…to communicate. Two blinks for yes. One blink for no. That simple gesture of blinking is how my long road to recovery began.
Today, as I’m asked to get on stage across the country and speak about overcoming adversity, I’m humbled by the thought that my suffering may help someone else facing their own challenges. I’m happy to share tales of gold medals and world records, of my work here at ESPN and with American Ninja Warrior, and even of the glitz and glam of Dancing With The Stars, but I’m reminded that all of that started by choosing to focus on the things in my life for which I am grateful.
I’m grateful you took the time to read this.
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