Mel Robbins - How To Deal With Fear and Anxiety

Mel Robbins
June 07, 2019

Mel Robbins

Technology CEO, Award-winning CNN Contributor & Authority on Achieving Breakthrough Performance so People Listen, Care and Take Action.
Motivation Inspiration Innovation Life Balance

Do you deal with fear and anxiety?

Mel Robbins, speaker, and author of The Five Second Rule, shares how you can break the habit of worrying, get control of your thoughts, and beat fear and anxiety. Here's an excerpt from our Beyond Speaking podcast interview with Mel Robbins. 

Brian Lord: "Anxiety is something many people are affected by every day.  How should they deal with it?"

Mel Robbins:  “If you're somebody that suffers from anxiety- and I know that battle well because I struggled with anxiety for twenty-five years of my life- I was on Zoloft which was a miracle drug for me. The thing to understand about anxiety is that there's a deep connection between your worries your body's state and anxiety and panic. So let me explain. Worrying is nothing more than the habit of thinking negative thoughts. That's all the worrying is.  You're thinking "what if". And you're typically thinking "what if" in a way that is negative. That's what a worry is. And believe it or not - it's a habit. We were all trained to worry by our parents. We are triggered to worry when there's uncertainty. It is a habit that we all have. And it is the baby to anxiety. Anxiety is the big sister. Anxiety is nothing more than when your body is agitated. That's it. That's all that anxiety is. Your heart races, your stomach twists up in knots, your armpits sweat.

Brian Lord: "What's the difference between worry and anxiety?"

"Worrying is the mental negative state. Anxiety is an agitated physical state."

-Mel Robbins

Mel Robbins: "When you get into an agitated physical state and you allow yourself to worry, your worries actually increases the physical agitation. It starts with worrying and then as you worry, your body starts to get a little nervous because you're worrying is making your body kind of tune in and get alert. And so it's coming agitated to pay attention because your thoughts have made it trigger to think that something might be wrong. So now we're going to live in a state where we've got to pay attention. As your body starts to get agitated, guess what happens to your mind? Your mind goes "Oh well, my body's agitated, and I caused it."

Brian Lord: "What happens next?"

Mel Robbins: “As your thoughts start to spiral, what will happen is the agitation rises. When the agitation in your body rises to such a state that your brain gets worried your brain will then have a panic attack and the panic attack is designed to get you out of whatever room you're in. Because you have now gotten yourself so worked up that you've convinced your own mind that you're in physical trouble.

So if you ever see somebody having a panic attack they're either saying "I got to get out of here." Oh my God, darting around like some weirdo you know, deer in the headlights or they're saying "I think I'm having a heart attack."

That is your brain alarmed that you've worked yourself up into such a state. So for people that struggle with anxiety, it is real. You should see a therapist and a licensed professional.

And here's the other thing. It's not a disease.

Brian Lord: "What is it, then?"

Mel Robbins: "It's a habit dysfunction that you can treat and you can get better and it starts with policing your worries. You want to win in life. Life is about a positive attitude and execution, and a positive attitude only comes when you are unwilling to let your thoughts drift to something that doesn't serve you. You can use five, four, three, two, one to start the process of retraining your mind- nope, we don't think about that cause it's not serving. I'm not going to do it. If you can break the habit of worrying and get control of your thoughts you will completely transform how much you're afraid. You will cut off anxiety at its knees.”


Subscribe on iTunes or go to BeyondSpeak.com to listen to the full interview.


Mel Robbins is a technology CEO, award-winning CNN contributor, and authority on achieving breakthrough performance so people listen, care, and take action. 

To book Mel for your next event, visit her profile: https://premierespeakers.com/mel_robbins

Joan’s most recent book title is The Five Second Rule. To order copies in bulk for your event, please visit BulkBooks.com.

Brian Lord is the President of Premiere Speakers Bureau and host of the Beyond Speaking Podcast.  Brian has been quoted in the Wall Street Journal, BBC Radio, the Huffington Post (UK), and was chosen as one of Nashville’s 40 Under 40.

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